All of the crew had been saving for years to start a business, and they all enjoyed regular conversations with their bank managers who were extremely weird, and their bank managers were people who kept trying to sell them the weirdest of policies. Brian had been sold a very strange policy without realising when he had purchased travel insurance. The extra policy was included in the small print, and this was something that he was charged for too. Insurance policies really do need examining of course, and Brian had before leaving the planet Earth, realised that this policy was incredibly weird. The policy stated that:

If you visit the planet Uranus, you cannot go to the toilet on the planet without written permission from someone in an office on Mars, someone who is dressed as a very large vegetable who is playing music loudly and dancing on their desk in the office whilst waving their arms in the air like a deranged lunatic.

If you visit Alpha Centurai, you are only allowed to enter the vicinity of Alpha Centurai whilst dressed as a Centaur and make horse like noises whilst waiting for the apocalypse.

If you visit any restaurant in the universe, you must sacrifice an eyelash whenever you see a beautiful cheesecake and shout, “I would like to marry you oh cheesecake!”

If you visit any space station in the entire universe, you must enter backwards, and also be carrying a mirror. You must also wave at yourself and then play with your hair as if in slow motion, then blow a kiss to yourself, and afterwards, take photographs of yourself like a paparazzi, as there are no paparazzi allowed on space stations whatsoever.

space2047 #Writer #BenRobinson #poetry #quotesoftheday