The pies of mars are notoriously difficult to open, and one day a man unfortunately lost his whole arm to a pie from mars. The pie was sentient and did not take too kindly to being attacked with a laser gun and bit off the mans arm and ate it. Unsurprisingly, the man afterwards did not want to eat the pie, but the pie did want to eat the man, and using its antigravity qualities the pie chased after the man down the high street and pursued him for several miles asking the man what on earth was he playing at. The man shouted back, well, I did want to eat you, and well, I did not realise that you were a sentient pie and feelings, so I really do apologise, because there has been some terrible mix up, and now you are trying to eat me. Why don’t we just go for a pint instead. Sadly, the pint was not good enough for the pie, and ate the man anyway, because well, it had been travelling through space for several decades without a decent meal.
The pies of mars
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